I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
