alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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