just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
How's work?
Spinning.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
