Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
