"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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