she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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