You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
