she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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