The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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