why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
