I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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