Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
