i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Randomize
