Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
