You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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