i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize