ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize
