okay pat passed out under dana's car
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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