Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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