oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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