I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
They took my balls.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
