Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
