summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
