the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
another moral hangover. fuck.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
