fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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