I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
