Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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