yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
