margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize