Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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