why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
