if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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