just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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