Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
