It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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