i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
