After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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