I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
