What a fucking waste of an outfit
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
We just shotgunned beers for America
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
