This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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