I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize