Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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