I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
