I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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