The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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