Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
