he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
