Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
