I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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