I hope mine doesn't look like that
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
